Yesterday's Weapons Forums

Stoopid kids have their Slim Whitman whistles the classics CD cranked all the way up again!!"

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Rodeo - you're doing it wrong.

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Door dashing hot noodle soup on a bike - not as easy as it looks.

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Went kinda heavy on the veggies, but it'll work.

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Jabba the Poot wedding cake.

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Affluent rednecks drive a Rolls Royce pickup.

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"Hey! Get that out of my tree! People will think I'm weird!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"No need to be so nervous - the fall won't kill you - it's that sudden stop at the bottom."

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Romantic Italian restaurant dinner date - squill style.

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"I know you won't listen to me so go ahead - bite it and learn!"

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"A turt, a mushrat and a loon walk into a bar... stop me if you're heard this one before."

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When putting your house on the market, it's well to mow the roof.

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"Forgot to mention it hisses a lot, too!"

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"Don't lay next to Randy - he's got a BAD case of crabs!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

For making burger from a really tough roast.

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Garage sale pickup topper = redneck bass boat.

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Solution for the gro never having charged shopping scooters.

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Speed loading - cap gun style.

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Whales like to sneak up on tourists and scare them stupid.

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The day our parrot disappeared.

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"Turn it back to the left, goat - the picture was a lot better there!"

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"Seriously, croc? You want to go flying that bad?"

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"Don't monkey with that stuff - it'll make you itch all day!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

_________________
My protests...
"Down with neck lines, Up with skirts!"
Dr. Frankenstein was a body builder.
FJB

The dreaded sumo butt drop.

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When you reach for the syrup but grab soy sauce instead. Remember - coffee first, then food.

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This little guy is obviously a pro.

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They make your house smell better, too... maybe.

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"I put a couple horns on this I could be a Viking parakeet!"

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Trying to start a 1% scooter gang... good luck getting anybody to join.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

1st frame is Yokozuna going after Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake.

Looks like the old Walker Theater.
Early to mid-80's WWF at it's small-market infancy.

Regards,

Doc Sharptail

_________________
"Ain't no Half-Way" -S.R.V.

"Oh Yeah!.....All Right!" -Paul Simon

"Well, better unhook and go into town for duct tape... a lot of duct tape."

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3 kilo hot dog and kilo of fries. Finish the lot in 30 minutes, and it's free!

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That gnome's gonna wig out when he sees somebody nicked his patio umbrella.

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It takes some people forever to finish a regular size can.

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Heckling bulls - have a good escape route planned.

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"Who's a good boy for being our designated driver?"

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Somebody's door dash dinner might be late.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

And he didn't even break a sweat!

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1% scooter gangs are really a thing in Indonesia.

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"Lucy... I'm home!!"

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"I think I'll go on break before the phone company people get here!"

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"Chicks dig horses with a 'stash!"

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Another reason not to vacation in Oz!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Learning to handle the cape without getting trampled in the process.

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When your great aunt house sits and cleans the aquarium.

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"There will be no shoplifting on my watch!"

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How many licks to get to the center of a jaw breaker? A LOT! (Plus a broken incisor.)

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Looks like the cow's nap buddy isn't quite ready for a nap.

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"You don't think I can double clutch when shifting? Wanna bet?"

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"But the toy is always clear at the bottom!"

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Looks like somebody is a big Leningrad Cowboys fan.

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Still think Reptilians don't walk among us?

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Be careful about doing your biz in the woods - you could be on the wrong end of a piggy prank!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Arguing with yourself isn't a big deal... if you have two heads.

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If you've always wanted to be a vet tech keep in mind getting stool samples is part of the job.

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Going AWOL in the Chinese army ends like this...

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Interesting concept, but it looks like the design needs a few tweaks.

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"I know you can run 35MPH... but not in a school zone."

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"I SO used to look just like that!"

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Always keep the lid of your ant farm snapped tightly shut!

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"It's an exotic vacation," they said... "It's a dry heat," they said... "Camels don't ALL bite," they said...

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Yes, girls - with a Little Suzie Home maker machine, you can sew your thumb to a garment just like Mommy!

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Caller #7 wins a new car... but caller #6 is gossiping with her sister: "Oh, she did? Oh, really?"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Russian pay phone?

Yes. There was an article about how they still have them in remote communities where there's no cell service at all. I lifted a pic of the oddest looking one just for something different. SW

_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"Didn't you set the parking brake????"
"No - that was supposed to be your job!"

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Parks and Recreation Dept opened a new stretch of beach to the public... and set out 5 porta potties.

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"Yo, door dash - just put my pizza on the stump. I'll be right down to get it."

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"For finding 24 kilos of dope, I got 3 tennis balls and a double cheeseburger. Best job EVER!!"

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Even lizards like nap buddies.

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"My new apartment is next door to an all U can eat buffet!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"I probably shouldn't say it, but you don't look anything like your dating profile pic."

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"Okay, mice - you're moving out... NOW!"

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R/C - big toys for big boys!

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"Yeah, all the mud doesn't look very good, but it's a sure cure for sea fleas!"

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Organic turn signals are legal in Turkey.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

There's a reason dinosaurs are extinct and squills aren't.

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Wearing glasses makes you look smarter... sometimes.

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If you think ants spoil a picnic, you haven't been invaded by crabs.

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Peter Piper picked a peck of these.

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Novelty knife holder. When you put one in, it says, "OUCH!!"

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"I'll be baaack!"

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"So I got a little carried away at the party last night - don't judge me!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Too much Vitamin B in your can o' pop will do this to you.

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"I would gladly pay you Tuesday for a halibut today!"

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Trampled by Turts - it could really happen!

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"Feds tap my phone line? Ha! They have to find it first!"

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"These guys are big tippers so Door Dash always takes their pizza right down to the beach."

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Skateboarding - bring bandages.

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Cow tipping in the 21st century.

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"What am I going to do with a knife? Ahhh... nuttin'."

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"Trying to put the sneak on me, eh? Well it ain't gonna work!"

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"Nope... no bears, guys - it's okay to come on up!"

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"I hope this movie's as good as everybody says - I bought my tickets online and they're not refundable."

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Cure for road rash?

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Red neck combination camper/party barge/bass boat.

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"Everybody drop on the count of 3, and we'll bean that squill!"

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Guido chose his career path in the spaghetti bending industry. He's still at it, too!

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Tenement for mini gnomes.

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Never turn your back on a chickadee - they're little meanies!

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"This is your spot? I don't see your name on it, stoopid penguin!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

New in the makeup aisle this fall - monobrow brushes.

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"Ha! I told 'em this crackerbox jail couldn't hold me!"

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Not many people eat the whole pepper.

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"Girl, those shoes SO don't go with your outfit!"

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"While you're at the C-store, grab me a pack o' menthol smokes, a YooHoo and some hot pork rinds."

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!