Yesterday's Weapons Forums

"I TOLD you not to monkey around over the cactus patch - now shut up and sit still!"

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Looks like little Prince Poophead figured out he could throw a fit and get away with it when reporters were watching.

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"No - we didn't lose no mittens. We've been wrongly accused of getting into the ham she fixed for dinner."

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"I had the oddest dream about being a sloth."

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"You know, life would be a lot easier for everybody if you'd put out birdseed in a nice bowl instead of a cage."

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Curly eye lashes? I don't see this catching on as a fashion trend.

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Evel Knievel used to put on shows for the neighborhood kids at this playground when he was little.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

i kinda recall a kid using old school zippo lighter fluid to ignite the slide like that - no one was on it thankfully - i think he used his daddys zippo to set it off too ,
i think that was right before the fire department visited to lecture us on fire safety - one room school in those days so im not sure my age but im thinking maybe K or 1 , i know i was really little back then , liked the firetruck a lot ,

Say what you will about the 'Commie Burgers' franchise - they have clean terlets.

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Lemmings and scooters - not a good combination.

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Crawdad chowder - I'm in!

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You moved tp a place with no trash pandas and thought your garbage would be safe? Ha!

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"I'll nick this while he's chasing my brother to get his phone back... I wonder how much I can get for it at the pawn shop? "

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I think this would do a lot better at tractor pulls than drag races.

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Slava Ukraini!!

"Bugs again? Why can't I ever have popcorn? Little squills get it all the time!"
"Shut up and eat your bugs!"

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"He's still there, right? Watch me smack him with a pie and run for it!"

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Even bus drivers like to turn it loose once in a while.

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Nap buddies 4 ever!

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"You already maxxed your tab - you're out of here until you pay it off!"

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"I TOLD you to put a lawn chair in there but do you ever listen to me? Nooooo!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

im in for the crawdads , ill take that crab if you dont want it - looks like dinner to me

What's for dinner when you get carried away with online auctions.

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Don't bet cows you can go longer without blinking - they win every time.

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"I finally found a place that makes peanut pizzas! w00t!"

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Time to quit being cheap and buy a new tube of divot glue.

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Punk rock guinea pigs.

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"Ham dog". Now that's worth looking into.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Texting your pals with selfies when approaching a waterfall... bad idea!

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Another double dog dare that shouldn't have been taken.

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Back in the day (60s) there was actually leg room on air liners and decent in flight snacks.

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Let's get creative with Jello!

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For feeding big get-togethers a large cauldron of plov works well. To start, you'll need a camel...

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Butter curlers - straight butter is the worst!

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When riding a bus in India remember there's no terlet up top. But it still smells a lot better than inside.

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Using old school toasters - you had to watch and pull your toast out before it ignited. (seriously)

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Tiny kegs and tiny steins on a plane.
What will they think of next

We had a toaster much like the one pictured, and yes, it did have to be watched.
Dad was fairly adept at splicing broken heat coils. He had a stash of tiny bronze pinch type sleeves that were made just for that purpose.

Regards,

Doc Sharptail

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"Ain't no Half-Way" -S.R.V.

"Oh Yeah!.....All Right!" -Paul Simon

If you didn't watch carefully and made black toast, the drill was to scrape black away until the desired shade of brown was achieved. No wasting bread! SW

_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

The Easter Bunny does things a little differently in Japan.

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Looks like the queen ant fancied a seafood dinner.

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"Yeah, I get cold ears - don't judge me."

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Monks aren't always as nimble as they let on.

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PS-2 cereal box prize. About as useful as those little cereal box yo-yos from back in the day that wouldn't yo.

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Your motor bonks but you jump out and leg it to the finish line. Now THAT'S a winning attitude!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"No, he doesn't live with me - he just gets his pizzas delivered here."

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"Hah! You missed again!"

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"Go back a page, kid - you read too fast for me."

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"There! Now they have to get out to change the tire!"

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After you move into a new apartment and pay the deposits, there isn't always money left to buy curtains.

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"Our pool parties are always so boring. We need a sound system and disco ball!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Practicing for his role in Top gun.

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"This is a family portrait - stop acting like a little goof!"

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"I would gladly pay you Tuesday for a nice, ripe mango today!"

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"Frogs don't make very good tick peckers."

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There are hazards other than tarantulas in a hand of bananas.

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"I'm bustin' out of this cracker box and giving whoever ratted me out such a bite!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"Goose step - you're doing it wrong, kid."

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"Nobody's looking - let's chuck that wood over there."

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"Why anybody would want a canary is beyond me. Can they sing the aria from Marriage of Figaro? I don't think so!"

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"You need to buy another couch. This one doesn't have enough cushions to make a proper fort."

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Watermelon/seafood jello - it's a thing in Japan.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"That's a pretty tasty sign! I'll take it home for later."

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Turning your back on rhinos - that's going in the book of really bad ideas!

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If you don't get carried away, a little diesel in the gas helps lube your motor.

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They're called spoilers because the spoil how your car looks.

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Bunion shoes. They help prevent them - or if you already have bunions, there's lots of room so they won't hurt as bad.

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"You can breathe stinky breath on me all day, but this is my spot and I'm not giving it up!"

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Amish can't have motor homes, but they still go camping.

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"What are we doing? Nuttin' much - just clowning around."

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"I'm trying to convince him its more fun to swim in the terlet than my water dish."

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Batman's family has been in the biz a lot longer than people think.

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"No peanut M&Ms? Again? Seriously?"

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Teaching your duck to do gymnastics - good luck!

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"Want a good laugh? Watch me blow butt and make those stoopid penguins run away!"

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"You want us to help push your car out?" (raucous laughter) "Yeah, right, dum bass!"

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When Mom sez you have to go play outside...

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"But I was caller #7 and won free movie tickets!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Cows don't like to get their feet wet after a pedicure.

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Middle school wannabe biker.

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Cheese soup with chicken - I WILL be trying that!

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"Dammit, Mom - I wanted bangs! They're trendy right now!"

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Pet chickens get scrunchies.

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"I'm ready to go now, snake - could you turn into the wind? It helps me gain altitude."

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"So... you gonna finish that potato salad?"

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"Stoopid woodpecker! This is my day to sleep in - go beat your brains out on somebody else's tree!"

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Slava Ukraini!!

"Sunscreen - don't go to the beach without it!"

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"My aunt is taking me for a nice ant dinner."

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"Yep! I was an extra in that Star Wars movie, and I do autographs for fresh fruit!"

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"Stoopid cat! I can get away from you with one wing tied behind my back!"

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HS girls in study hall playing pitch and spitting sunflower seeds. Eastern Europe isn't so different from here.

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I hate it when that happens!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

that wanna be biker spent a bundle on that bike

For sale - used Jaguar. Might need a battery.

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Messing with seagulls - pretend you have food and watch 'em get all mad.

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"Vivaldi's all well and fine, but how about some hard rock?"

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"I'm still mad about you getting in my food dish!"

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"I take my nap buddy everywhere - you never know when you'll feel like a nap!"

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"I'll just zip down to the marina for a 6 pack of Yoo Hoo and some flaming hot Cheetos."

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Relocating bees - you're doing it wrong. Really wrong!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"My phone's still in there - would you call me a tow truck?"
"Sure! You're a tow truck!"

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I'll wait as long as it takes for that stoopid cat to come back!"

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Drive through grocery in Cal. ca. 1949. A concept that wouldn't catch on for another 50 years or so.

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Freezing cold Cheetos - those might go well with strawberry Quick.

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Keep saving parts you find at garage sales and you'll soon have a scooter!

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Texting while biking - don't.

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For when you don't feel like taking all day to plow.

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"This is not the hover car you're looking for!"
"That line only works if you're a legit Jedi - get your license and registration for me!"

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Slava Ukraini!!