Yesterday's Weapons Forums

"Letter in a bottle"

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"I called shotgun at breakfast, but the dog gets to sit there!"

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Russian cartoon...
"Oops!"
"Dang - where did it go?"
"Here it is, pal!"
"Oh, thanks!"

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Apparently Euro plastic chairs are made a lot tougher than the ones we have.

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Too much month left at the end of the money & your work lunch shows it? Been there! Also happens after pooping away too much $ on a gun!

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Steampunk table

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Iranian pimp

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Things are about to get real in the shire...

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The rest are essentially harmless pranks you can do with stuff everyone has on hand.
I like the chicken fried cardboard!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

im not into the pranks so much , ive generally found them less fun than advertised

pranks do tend to be more fun for the pranker than for the pranked.

Substituting someone's hard boiled eggs with fresh ones, always good for a chuckle or two.

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"Like a tank with it's tracks blown off, my turret still swivels and my cannon fires, so whenever the fight kicks off, I'll likely live or die right there, where the fight begins and ends"
John Connor

When I was in law enforcement, one of the plain clothes guys would come into the office with newspaper in hand and head straight for the terlet. Slide the bar on the door & hit the sports section. Every day.

Saw him exit his car one morning - paper under his arm & we knew where he was going. I went in the terlet (only one stall) & sprayed mace into the bowl. You couldn't smell it.

Me & a couple other guys were yakking - he came in said "Hi" & sat down...

"Whoooo-eeeee! I got to lay off the hot sauce!" SW

_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

A gentle reminder related to the triple cheese pizza you had for supper the previous evening.

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"Arrrrrr!! Circle the boats! There be pirates about!"

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Mother Russia is a cold mother.

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"Swimming pool on a budget"

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"A tearful job"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

could be pirates - ive heard of that , but could be the party of the year just getting started , im in for that ,

"Oh, how I love Monday!"

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"Dear, I don't think one turkey is going to be enough!"

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"Multifunction calculator"

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"But what can you haul in a pickup like this?"
"Ass! Duh!"

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"No, I'm only smelling it!"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Creative pie

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Zombie dogs - nobody is safe!

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Scrambled eggs @ -60 degrees.

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I'd spring this on my lib-tard SiL, but she already doesn't speak to me!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"What's a bear have to do to get a little service around here?"

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Wait until the snake finds out somebody left a hard boiled egg in the nest!

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"The last selfie"

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"Are we there yet?"

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"How's life, cats?"

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"Sports shoes"

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"When you own a cabriolet but you live in Siberia"

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A cat trap that works every time.

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"In case of fire, find a ladder."

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

"Saliva generator"

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"Going nowhere"

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A work-around for guys who can't pass the motorcycle license exam.

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"Segway farmer"

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Becoming king of the mountain often involves underhanded tactics.

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The bad news - a parking ticket.
The good news - a free racing stripe!

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Being hammered and wandering into a really cheep tattoo place - there's a negative consequence.

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Slava Ukraini!!

i have no tattoos but i get the idea , it is unfortunate that some of our best thinking regarding these happens when alcohol is involved

"Realistic Barbie in Russia"

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Bring an apple to be on the teacher's good side? They do it a little differently in Russia.

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Trash pandas love to get flowers!

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"I was hoping for triple cheese with extra anchovies, but pepperoni works, too!"

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"Hit the gas and let's make that guy jump for it!"

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There's a pile of extra blankeys by the bed... I don't think there's enough of them!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

id give the bubble a try once .its kinda cool

"Cheater"

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"Secret American program to settle the moon"

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"Surprise!!"

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"Quarreling"

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"When everybody is playing outside but you're sick."

_________________
Slava Ukraini!!

Yes, it keeps your nose warm, but is it really worth it?

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"Your grandmother in a Japanese restaurant"

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"Are you 100% sure the cat didn't leave that mess?"

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"There's a reason I didn't answer the door after the first 200 knocks, fool! And I'm not buying a vacuum sweeper!"

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Looks like girlfriend A found out about girlfriend B!

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"Houston, there's a problem with re-entry..."

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Slava Ukraini!!

now that landing is so going to leave a mark!

"Typically Texas"

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"There! Now that it's gone, I can spot cats 2 blocks away!"

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Missing money lately?

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"Man! I'm so stuffed, I couldn't eat another salmon if I had to!"

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Don't try this at home, kids!

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The phrase, "travel light - freeze at night" was originated by Sherpas.

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What to do with a 500# pumpkin? Start carving!

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_________________
Slava Ukraini!!